[Game of Thrones] season 1 to 7 the ultimate recap

Game of Thrones Season 1

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Robert Baratheon is king and he and his trophy wife Cersei travel up north to see old, buddy Ned Stark who loves to remind everyone in a very Bluff northern accent winter is coming Robert asked Ned if he wants to be hand of the king Ned doesn’t want it, but he can’t refuse Meanwhile, Cersei gets caught shagging her own brother. Jaime by Ned’s youngest son Bran, who gets shoved out the window crippling but not killing him Ned’s sad family joined Robert’s messed-up family And they all head down south to King’s Landing apart from Ned’s bastard son. Jon Snow He joins the Nights Watch at the wall a massive structure used to keep the savages in the north far away from the slightly less savage people in the regular north Tyrion the dwarf brother of Jaime and Cersei Visits the wall leaves is accused of trying to murder Ned’s son and sense it to a trial at the Eyrie by Ned’s Sister-in-law who was a few sandwiches short of a picnic He chooses trial by combat and a most recalled bran fights on his behalf for cash. He wins and Tyrion goes free because Meanwhile in a much warmer place across the Narrow Sea Daenerys Targaryen Who was the daughter of the previous king gets married off the Dothraki horselord Karl Drogo? She gets pregnant eats a heart and he’s given three dragon eggs as a wedding gift Her brother is a dick about the whole thing So Karl go–pause a load of molten gold onto his head and kills him Later on Drogo gets mortally wounded Daenerys tries to save him with blood magic, but instead of resurrecting a hubby She hatches the dragon heads and gets three scaly pets for her troubles back in King’s Landing Ned discovers that Cersei has been banging her brother Jaime for ages and Sadistic heir to the throne Joffrey along with less sadistic heir Tommen and not Robert’s children after all This puts him in a pickle because his eldest daughter Sansa is betrothed to Mary the sadistic. Jerk Joffrey Robert gets killed by a pig whereupon Ned tell Cersei that he knows a sadistic jerk of a son isn’t the true heir Cersei bribes the city guards. They put a net on trial sadistic. Jerk Joffrey brackets now King closed brackets orders his death Ned dies because it’s the law that Sean Bean dies in everything in which he appears a Putt from sharp

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